What, you ask? Happy to tell you. It’s this: athletes, entertainers, politicians, and other public figures who openly, loudly, obnoxiously, and aggressively attribute every minor increment of their success to The Jesus. And you’ve all heard them. No matter what the question or context of the conversation, at some point these smug pricks have to toss in: “I’d also like to thank my lord and savior, Jesus Christ for this blessing.”
Sanctimonious assholes.
A Sanctimonious Asshole
Sure, this isn’t a new observation, and you’ve heard other, more erudite geeks pop off about it before. In fact, you’re likely so bored by the whole thing you’ve probably already clicked the back button on the browser so you aren’t reading this. I’m all alone here, typing to nothing. I can say anything. Like “turd” or “donkey fart.” It’s kind of liberating to shout in the dark.
Anyway, I’m thinking about this because I’m watching the final few moments of the first round NCAA tournament game between Memphis and Oral Roberts University, and right now, with a minute and some change left, the Fightin’ Fundies are on the wrong end of a vengeful god of the Old Testament style 94 -78 ass-whipping, being beaten like a read-headed stepchild refusing to wash away their sins by agreeing to love the Jesus.
This gives me an amount of glee that makes me wonder how I would have reacted if I were in the stands watching a lion rip some poor xian geek to shreds in Roman times.
A Buffet Of Christians
Would I cheer, turn away in disgust, or chip in by being one of the volunteers poking the true believer with a long, sharp stick? Interesting question, the true answer of which likely would provide deep insight into my psyche.
Anyway, it leads me to wonder: if Jesus can save but can’t hit an open jump shot, what good is he?
Jesus Teasing Fat White Kids
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25 comments:
Jesus saves.
Moses invests.
Oh come on now, I don't pick on Mark for wearing his religion on his sleeve. Be nice. I am a Christian but don't feel obligated to go around thanking him for every little thing that happens in my life. I do say grace at every family meal, though. I think people who publicly run around doing that have something to prove, and frankly they kind of scare me.
I guess bloggging about support for Israel, among many other varied topics, constitutes wearing my religion on my sleeve?
I'd like to know where we draw the line between wearing one's cultural identity on one's sleeve and just being one's cultural self.
If a Hispanic speaks with a Latin accent and certain Spanish words is he wearing his Hispanic sense of identity on his sleeve? Do we chastise him for not speaking like a WASP from Connesticut? For not dressing like a Yale preppie? For not having lighter skin?
Not sure where you're going with that comment, Tim.
Now, now. If you boys can't play in the sandbox nicely, I'll have to hose you down and fill your mouths with soap.
Let's just agree that there is enough room in this comment section to accomodate both a fierce Zionist and a subdued Christian.
I mean, there is more than enough absurdity ripe for mocking on both sides of that fence.
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"I mean, there is more than enough absurdity ripe for mocking on both sides of that fence"
Of course, as a tolerant member of the Left there is SOOOOO much room for everyone's point of view.
Unless you disagree with it. Then it's a farce to be mocked.
Not very open-minded of you.
"Unless you disagree with it. Then it's a farce to be mocked."
You've been eating boiled meat again, haven't you?
Your words, not mine.
Look, you want to debate the finer points of Zionism or Judaism, fine. And I can joke with the best of them, but I make it a point not to slam someone simply because of their religious beliefs or political leanings. And when someone does that to me, I will call them on it. Swiftly. It's about respect. If anyone has a hard time understanding that concept, you need to go back and take a refresher course in Common Decency 101.
Settle down, Mark ... as I see it nobody slammed you on anything, other than mentioning that you wear your religion on your sleeve. Whether that is true or not, I don't know, but it certainly didn't seem like Tim meant any offense by it. Besides, as is pretty obvious, you are a passionate guy.
My post slammed self-righteous xians, who endlessly and irritatingly have to shove their faith in our faces regardless of context. I've read more than a few posts on your blog where you take a few haymakers at people - that's kind of the point of blogging.
It seems that you are just a little touchy about both this post and the comments, particularly in regards to taking me to task for an insult or lack of respect that simply isn't there.
Regardless, I apologize for the boiled meat comment. You may have as much of that as you like.
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" I can joke with the best of them, but I make it a point not to slam someone simply because of their religious beliefs or political leanings."
Hmmm....I think I get it. This must be a different Mark. It CAN'T be the one who used to call me a "lefty-loon" even though I'm not even a lefty. It CAN'T be the guy who used to tell me to take my opposing opinions to another site where they'd be welcome. THAT guy wasn't always very nice about politcal disagreement on his site, although he was nicer to some folks about it than others, to give him some credit.
Nice to meet you, New Mark.
I didn't see how the sleeve comment was insulting, either.I suspect that you've taken his choice of phrase in the wrong light. And I didn't even get the boiled meat thing. What was THAT about?
I have to ask, though, Fez.....why would the creation of personal arguments be the POINT of blogging? I guess people can have all sorts of different points to doing this, but is that REALLY yours?
" I can joke with the best of them, but I make it a point not to slam someone simply because of their religious beliefs or political leanings."
Hmmm....I think I get it. This must be a different Mark. It CAN'T be the one who used to call me a "lefty-loon" even though I'm not even a lefty. It CAN'T be the guy who used to tell me to take my opposing opinions to another site where they'd be welcome. THAT guy wasn't always very nice about political disagreement on his site, although he was nicer to some folks about it than others, to give him some credit.
Nice to meet you, New Mark.
I didn't see how the sleeve comment was insulting, either. It just means that your religion is out there for the world to see, and it certainly is. There's nothing wrong with that, the way you do it (that is, in a non-proselytizing way.) I suspect that you've taken his choice of phrase in the wrong light. And I didn't even get the boiled meat thing. What was THAT about?
I have to ask, though, Fez.....why would the creation of personal arguments be the POINT of blogging? I guess people can have all sorts of different points to doing this, but is that REALLY yours?
Hmmm again......I guess "Preview" means "Post Anyway".....
Back to your old ways, I see, Joe. Leopards really can't change their spots, can they?
What's that supposed to mean?
"As long as they don't preach to me, I couldn't give a shit."
Yup. That's what I was trying to say. There's nothing wrong with wearing your religion on your sleeve as long as you don't try to get others to change their sleeves. I've never seen Mark do that, and that is what I said.
I stand corrected about you, Joe. Thanks.
I stand by the rest of my remarks.
I heard there was alcohol being served here and rushed right over. So WTF??
Mark.....no problem.
Paula......World Trade Federation?
We Toke Freely?
Wombats Tickle Ferrets?
Sorry. Could be the whisky.
BTW.........boiled meat? WTF?
I heard there was alcohol being served here and rushed right over. So WTF??
False alarm, P. Just a bunch of sanctimonious Marxists who spilled whiskey on their sleeves.
=8:{)>
Whiskey? The Monkey prefers Tequila Blanca, but to each his own. There's more than enough room at this party for all drinks, ideas, gods, etc.
Just don't go out of your way to thank The Jesus for mixing a killer cocktail, and we are cool.
Thank you Jesus, for our drinks. And thank your Dad for boiled monkey brains.
If i ever win the Oscar / Nobel Prize / Citizen of the Year / Grammy / King of the World I am going to Thank Satan in my speech.
Then take offence to anyone who slams me for being a Satan worshipper - what's the big deal? It's my cultural identity!
*takes a truckload of boiled meat and dumps it all over everything - except the nice red fez*
Never soil hats. It's only polite.
Holy shit Batman! Mark, that was not an insult! Not anymore than a Deadhead bumper sticker on your truck is wearing your musical tastes on your sleeve. Man, quit being so sensitive! Why would I insult you when I consider you a friend? :). Now come on over here and give us a hug!
Mark: Sigh.
Bowel: Thanks for keeping the fez spotless ... you don't know how much it costs to dry clean those things. Praise satan, I guess.
Tim: Personally, I am baffled at Mark's offense, but then again, I'm not all that bright. I need to get back to that Common Decency 101 Course. But there is one amusing thing in all this - the sublime contradiction in this snippet:
Of course, as a tolerant member of the Left there is SOOOOO much room for everyone's point of view.
Unless you disagree with it. Then it's a farce to be mocked.
Not very open-minded of you.
It's almost a zen koan.
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